| (no subject) |
[Sep. 14th, 2007|03:17 pm] |
i had such an amazing night i had to get on here and say something about it.
i am seriously so happy i ran into him again.
hes like, my best friend.
:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 28th, 2007|05:11 pm] |
work work work
blah blah blah
some bullshit about harrasment
blah blah blah
friends in jail for "throwing deadly missle" aka plastic bottle.
bullshit bullshit bullshit.
i got a new tattoo. check out the myspace to view.
orlando for one week in october. the 15th threw the 20th. im cited. alec said i can go to disney this time and ride the peter pan ride. i miss the snow white ride too. but chaaaknow. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 20th, 2007|01:17 pm] |
its been forever.
everyone is always posting and doing. but i just cant find the time.
i read everything everyone writes so dont think ive given up yet. ha.
the boys are doing so well. their band is getting up there. its pretty amazing.
i work...
thats life. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 12th, 2006|08:18 am] |
i feel good. lately everything has been looking up. i work a whole lot and feel like i never have any free time. but other then that. everything is ok.
im trying to hang out with more people. so i wont feel so low when i spend my nights off by myself.
going christmas shopping monday and possibly tuesday. anyone wanna join?? let me know. ill drive. you might just have to chip in a few for gas, but thats about it. haha. and im not talking like 10 dollars. just like 5 or less. the more people the less money haha.
my kittens popped our air mattress. even through all the blankets we put around the poppable parts. its ok though. we need a real bed anyway.
me and alec fought for the past two days. sad fights. where we both almost cried. but everything is beautiful now..
HOLLA ABOUT MONDAY OR TUESDAY! |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 10th, 2006|10:00 am] |
im a proud mommie. and i love my babies. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 5th, 2006|04:51 pm] |
we dont have privacy.
and im not just speaking about my two precious little angels who we share a room with.
im talking everyone who comes around. they dont know how to leave our shit alone. haha.
shopping for christmas is so much fun!!
im off again with chris's mom??? yeah shes def. awesome. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 23rd, 2006|03:38 pm] |
Happy Turkey
's are the ones who dont get eaten
DAY! |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 22nd, 2006|11:11 am] |
doctors have no reason to work at hospitals if them dumb bitches cant even tell you what wrong with you. i had blood in my urine. like not a little. it was like someone stabbed me in my vagina. (sorry to put it that way) it was scary. it made me weak and pale. alec freaked out...
i was at work. everything was fine. i went to the bathroom... after all i forgot to go that morning and it was only 10. so i peed. nothing happend. looked into the toilet before flushing and it was FULL of blood. i was pissed cause i thought i had started my period again. (after just ending it 4 days ago) i texted alec and asked him to bring me a tampon.. cause i thought it was my period after all. i waited and then went back to the restroom and i couldnt even start peeing before the toilet was full of blood again. i took the tampon out. clean. yea sorry about the details. hahahahaha. i went to the hospital and no one could tell me what it was. it wasnt an infection. it wasnt kidney stones. so NOW i have to see an obgyn and a urologist.
hopefully they will tell me more. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 19th, 2006|07:39 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  content | ] |
| [ | music |
| | gregory and the hawk | ] |
i love my ipod. i have a whole section of momma songs.
ok so ive been thinking about her a lot. i know shes not perfect but i would do ANYTHING for her. if it wasnt for her i wouldnt be alive to enjoy all of the things i have gotten to. ALL OF THEM. things that were horrible (fighting with friends, millions of laughing break-ups, many wonderful friends, laughing about the rediculous times, remembering where i came from, growing up, parties ::those very few HA::, my brother, teaching me to love, all of it.) ive had a lot of good and bad things happen over the course of my life.
and you know what else... thanks friends. thank you for forming me like mold into the person i am. and thank you enemies for teaching me that some people just suck.
Have a Good Night, Friends. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 11th, 2006|09:06 am] |
| [ | music |
| | paramore-pressure | ] |
ok here we go. i dont want to offend any one with this.. but im pretty sure no one has ever been given up on as many times as me. (again i dont want anyone to be unhappy with my post)
My mother and father gave up on us about 2 months into my freshman year. they were never around, we never had food, no money, and if it werent for my grandmother, i probably would have never had new shoes or clothes. while everyone else was buying brand new yearbooks mom and dad bought them, i just looked through whoever asked me to sign theres. and through all that i pretended to happy.
my aunt and my uncle invited me to north caroline for christmas. i took up that offer so very fast. it was the best time i had. they told me plans they had for me, which made a little nervous but i still didnt care. someone was acting like they cared. i just smiled and took it in. i decided i didnt want the easy life. i had never had it. and i wasnt used to it. when i told them this, the asked for everything back they had ever bought me. my computer, my prepaid cell phone. all of it.
my mom and dad dropped me off at a friend of theirs house and didnt come back. their loss not mine. i knew i was a good kid. i lived with her until i felt like cinderella. i was cleaning to go out. i wasnt allowed to leave until the house was perfect, which this house was far from. it was roach infested and stunk like dead fish. but it was somewhere to live. i couldnt take it anymore. i cried myself to sleep every night in the twin bed i shared with their 13 year old daughter. i had to leave.
i had a boyfriend once who i thought was amazing, ha. joke. he ended up being just like everyone else. his family took me in and treated me nice. the only thing i had to do was get a job and graduate. i did those to things and they left for vacation. my and the "boyfriend" got into a little squabble and that was it. again i was givien up on.
i moved away from the drama. the threats, the depressing area. i thought i would never be happy if i stay. so i ran away. leaving the people who actually cared behind. i thought i was making a good choice. but i knew i wouldnt be happy for awhile.
my aunt took me in in pensacola. yes i moved almost 600 miles away. i knew that if the people i left behind were my true friends they would understand and would still keep in touch with me. (phones, email, myspace, and so on. its easy to reach a person now-a-days) everything was great. i got a job working at a bagel shop. met some of the most amazing people ever that took me into there small groups right away. it felt like home for awhile. i had a mother (really an aunt) which i hadnt had in a long time and a family. it felt good. im an individuali did my own thing while still following every rule she ever mapped out for me. i called if i was going to be late. i cleaned my room when it needed it and i always cleaned up after myself. i even helped her clean up after my cousin. thought everything was going great.
i met the most amazing guy i had ever met in my life. he was perfect. sure we had some troubles in the begining but now, we just laugh about the names we called eachother. we were amazing for eachother. we clicked so fast. we like all the same things. music, tv shows. everything.
we left to visit my old friends. i thought everything was perfect when i left "home". it wasnt. her anger built while i was gone. she hated the way i was. she didnt tell me to my face, instead she called while i was away and told me to find other living arangements. i cried my whole vacation. another one gave up on me. i wasnt suprised really. she didnt seem different then my mother.
from there i moved in with my manager from work who only 3 days after i moved got fired from her job. i knew it was going down hill from there. but he was my last bit of hope. and he stuck by me through all my depression and unhappiness. i was horrible for a good time. liz and her mom did so much for me. i thank them so much. they were the first people to not just give up. i gave up on them. and for that im sorry. but things just werent working there.
so here i am. me and my boyfriend are living with his alcoholic mother and helping raise his 5 year old sister. THEY have 2 dogs who piss and shit all over the house and get into the garbage every time we turn around. the dirty dishes are piled to the ceiling and your feet stick to the kitchen floor when you walk on it. but this is home. only because he's here. i work so much i dont have time to eat here so i know the mess isnt mine. but i cant be responsible and clean it up anymore. they are lazy people. sarah, alecs mom and his little sister. i dont blame her as much. shes young. but they dont make her have any responibitlity at all. when its just me and her she loves to help clean. why dont they just ask her? i need something thats mine. we are getting an apartment in march. its all in order. i just have to put up with this until then.
theres my story. now you know my happiness is just a front.
how sad. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 11th, 2006|08:38 am] |
ok i guess im ready for an update.. first this.. then ill post another.
1. YOUR SPY NAME: (middle name and current street name)
Nichole Seagull
2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad's side, your favorite candy)
Patricia FastBreak
3. YOUR RAP NAME: (first initial of first name, first three or four letters of your last name)
A-Diss (hahahaha)
4. YOUR GAMER TAG: (a favorite color, a favorite animal)
green cat
5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Nichole St.Petersburg
6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name)
Disacycly
7. JEDI NAME: (middle name spelled backwards, your grandmother's maiden name spelled backwards)
Elohcin Onnuv
8. PORN STAR NAME: (first pet's name, the street you grew up on)
Kitty Chalet
9. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, the automobile your mom drives)
The Green Concord
10. YOUR ACTION HERO NAME:(first name of a main character in the last movie you watched, last food you ate)
DJ Peporoni Pizza |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 14th, 2006|08:24 pm] |
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i had a good vacation. it was a week ago. but it was good. we came to the conclusion about our big decision we were having to make. its going to be for the better. more details to come later. im about to go and clean up some things. cause lord knows.. our room needs it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 27th, 2006|12:28 am] |
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one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week one week |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 20th, 2006|08:32 pm] |
dear diary,
Today was a waste of time. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 12th, 2006|05:57 pm] |
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im excited. now its offical. i cant wait to go on this trip. i want to take loads of pictures because i just want to. i want pictures of everyone who comes to see me. EVERYONE WHO COMES. so if you plan on coming please be cute like i know you always are, cause i will be getting pictures!! |
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| i need to do this: |
[Sep. 9th, 2006|12:07 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  disappointed | ] |
just sit back and listen. thats all im asking for right now. i just need to get all of this off my shoulders.
I'm very upset with the decisions you have made tonight. I dont know what you were thinking it would accomplish. I told you do what you thought was right. You did. Not thinking ONCE about me. If I'm so goddamn important to you why do you insist on hurting my feelings? WHY. Im so sorry and I really do want to apologize for being sort of "over protective" in a way. But once a liar, ALWAYS A LIAR. So I'm still not sure if I can trust you. You haven't lied since then, but you also haven't done what you are doing tonight. I hear my phone go off every ten seconds. But I WILL NOT ANSWER. I'm done tonight. This is my final message to you for the evening. I WILL not be the same as normal this week. You went against what I said to you and went out anyway. I didnt ask you to stay home. But I did ask you to take into consideration how I felt. And you didn't.
In other news.. I have to work in the morning at 7. So I think between tears I'll try and get some sleep. Goodnight Everyone. |
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| hotel and plans: |
[Sep. 7th, 2006|12:55 pm] |
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in motion. we booked the hotel this morning. everything is coming together. we are booking our bus tickets 2 weeks from today. this is going to be fun! |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 6th, 2006|06:44 pm] |
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ok new livejournals are like starting over. |
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ashly_fallsdown's journal